Still hanging in there

You just never can tell what life is going to bring you from one minute to the next. We've been on a roller coaster for the last few months and we just have to trust that it is going to end in the right place. Some days, I am calm and ok with the ride. Other days - well, let's just say - are not as pretty.

What the heck am I talking about?

Well. I'm still pregnant and it looks like a little baby is hanging in there.

What the what?

Well. Here is the next part of the story...

After going through all the sypmtoms of a miscarraige (and I will spare you the details as this is afterall, the Internet) my doctor asked me to come in for an ultrasound to check for an ectopic pregnancy and to make sure all of the pieces from the failed pregnancy had left my body properly. We were calm and accepting of what had happened. I trusted my body was doing the right thing and expected a clean bill of health. The ultrasound technician did a thorough job and checked over all of my various parts carefully. After about 20 minutes, she moved the ultrasound into my uterus and low and behold - she pointed to a little heartbeat and a little body in there.

The world stopped and I heard Jeremy's heart start beating out of his chest. A moment later (or 5 minutes later, I'll never know), the waterworks started pouring down my face and I had to ask her to repeat that please and could you tell me just what is going on here?

We're not sure what happened exactly. It may have been a twin that didn't make it. It may have been some abnormal tissue in my body. My doctor simultaneously reassures and exasperates me almost every visit when she tells me that "oh, that can be totally normal." It's her answer for a little pain here, a skin change there, and apparently half losing your pregnancy and your mind. "Oh, that can be totally normal" - which is only saying that in pregnancy (as in life) almost everything and nothing can be normal. She did say this was rare and they would be watching carefully so we've been doing just that.

This was almost a month ago and we've been on pins and needles for much of the time in between. At 11 weeks, we are starting to feel like all will be well but we are perfectly aware that it isn't in our hands and never has been.

Life will take us where it takes us. The roller coaster continues and whether you choose it or not, you are along for the ride. So keep your seatbelt fastened, arms and legs inside the ride at all times, and - Here We Go!

Here's our first peak at Adventure Baby: 7-week ultrasound