It's a boy!

Today was our 19-week ultrasound. You're going to have a little brother!

This pregnancy has been very different than the first so I was thinking it could be a boy for a while now. I've craved some different foods (baked potatoes and lemonade being at the top of the list - with you it was corndogs and cake). I have been less emotional and somehow, even more tired (I would not have guessed it possible). I've gained around the same amount of weight but my body is so different that some of my favorite maternity tops from the last go-round leave my belly hanging out the bottom or don't even fit on. Meanwhile, my pants fall down constantly and I am dead-gone sick of pulling them up OVER and OVER. By late afternoon, I'm just ready to let them fall to the floor and give up, in the grocery store or not.

I've started the process of cleaning out all of your tiny little things I was saving for a little sister. Oh boy, tears and more tears. It is so hard to let some of them go. I put aside a box of specials to save Forever but even the stained t-shirt and lone striped sock pull at my heart strings. Could you just slow down and stop growing out your clothes? Well, a mama can dream.

Here's a current favorite of yours and mine. It was made by a friend out of old costumes from Burning Man. If it could talk, I bet this fabric could tell some really interesting stories. Of course, it will be about 18 more years until you are old enough to hear them.

In the process, I have been remembering all of your tiniest days and I'm starting to crave having that little warm body all over again. In just 21 more weeks, I'll be looking down at this view again and listening to those little gurgles and squeaks.

Two kids under two and in diapers! A beautiful daughter and now a son. I'm scared to death of how I'm going to manage it all, but I also couldn't feel luckier.

Love,

Mama