Spring fever

Spring is in bloom and the neighborhood is alive again with people enjoying the amazing weather and fresh air. Young couples are everywhere holding hands and staring gaga at each other. Seeing them sure brings back memories. I am so glad I had the experience of young love - and forever grateful for the amazing gift it is to love your dad.

I remember my first attachment with treasured fondness. It was simple, innocent, and beautiful. Reciprocated adoration is powerful and the first time you feel it is not something you ever forget. He gave me my first kiss when I was 15 years old and it was a moment of pure magic.

A lot of stops and starts, ups and downs, brilliant moments, and startling humiliations later - I met your dad. I knew he was the one when he made me feel the magic - along with an amazing sense of calm - just being near him. When he told me he loved me and asked me to marry him, every color in the world got a little brighter. I still feel that spark and love him dearly for everything he is. He is my soul and life; I am his. He is easily the best thing that has ever happened to me; you two are a distant second.

Do I want all of this for both of you? Absolutely. Does it scare the bejesus out of me? Absolutely! Undoubtedly more so as we get closer to your adolescent years.

I was cautious and lucky (!) enough to make it through early relationships without permanent scars or awful mistakes. But it wasn't easy and I had my heart and soul ripped out more than once. I don't like thinking of either of you going the emotional ups and downs that come with crushes and dating but they are somewhat inevitable when you enter the arena of young love.

And then there is pregnancy, venereal disease (ack!), photos on the Internet - and all kinds of nightmares that can cause a lifetime of regret. I managed to avoid those pains but I was close enough to sufferers to see the downside of love can be costly and permanent. Making it through the gauntlet is certainly no sure thing and seeing you caught in those situations breaks my heart just thinking about it.

Plus, after all the blood, sweat, and tears we will put into raising you, seeing you fall in love with someone less than worthy would be a disaster. Heaven help me if you choose to date someone I can't stand, or worse - someone who isn't good to you.

So please, take it slow. Lasting love takes more maturity and perspective than you will have in your teens. It is important for you to develop and learn about yourself during those years so you will be ready when the right chance comes along. Trust that lifelong love will find you - hopefully for all of our sakes, after you are 25. At least 21? Well, a mom can hope.

When you are lucky enough to feel a true spark with any amazing person, relax and savor the small things - holding hands, sitting close, honest conversation, shared laughs, dancing. Trust that there will be plenty of time for the big stuff later. Rushing through means you miss out.

Honesty and respect always matter. Anyone who doesn't give you both, doesn't truly love you. Be uncompromising in giving them to yourself and expecting them from others.

Keep an open mind to the advice of true friends and those who love you. Try to understand that we want what is best for you (how did I end up on this side of the cliche? Beware, you will too!).

Keep your wits about you. Love is intoxicating enough. Bringing any drugs and alcohol into the situation can quickly confuse things and ruin what is real.

Through it all, mind your curfew, be honest with your parents, and please, please, try not to do anything stupid.

Love,
Mama