"For a long time, we grew side by side; our roots will always be tangled. I'm glad for that.” ~ Ally Condie, Matched
Somewhere over the past year, my age hit one half of yours. I finally reached the age you were when you had me. Your life seems so connected to mine that it's hard to believe I missed half of it – so much happened before that 38th year!
I missed your youth in Fillmore. Your days traveling with your mom and Annie. Your countless performances in the band and orchestra. The spectacle of you as prom queen, homecoming queen, and cheerleader! I wasn't there when you graduated from college. When you got married and bought your first home. You already had 4 children and 13 years of marriage behind you before my very first day in the world!
Only now, that I am reaching this point - do I realize just how much I missed. A whole other lifetime I have only glimpsed through pictures and stories. A lifetime that holds up all that has become of mine.
“Parents rarely let go of their children, so children let go of them. They move on. They move away. The moments that used to define them - a mother's approval, a father's nod - are covered by moments of their own accomplishments. It is not until much later, as the skin sags and the heart weakens, that children understand; their stories, and all their accomplishments, sit atop the stories of their mothers and fathers, stones upon stones, beneath the waters of their lives.” ~ Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven
I was there when you had another child, got divorced, managed a business, sold the home you raised us in and moved. Moved again twice. Played music for a thousand different events. Survived the passing of your mother and many relatives and friends. Helped your kids through missions, weddings, college, and having kids of their own. Volunteered thousands of hours for the church and other organizations. Made friends. Lost friends. Loved your grandchildren to pieces. Finished a full time mission in Nauvoo.
I am so proud of you. So amazed by your life and your being.
The next 38 years are stretching out in front of me. So many opportunities and pathways I can't even imagine yet. Two kids to raise! So many to lose (you!!). Who knows what I will have to survive and accomplish.
I am daunted. And I am inspired.
I am ever so thankful to have such a wonderful mom. So grateful that our roots are tangled. So happy that while my life moves ahead into the unknown, it will always lead back to you.
I wish I could see you every day. I will treasure whatever time I get and always wish for more. 38 years with you has hardly been enough.
With all my love,
Margaret
